Category Archives: Project Laughter

Of Tablets & Heartbreak

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We travelled over the Christmas for the holiday and during this period, every discussion we had with King-Earl was laced with hidden references to his desire for Tablets. You see his cousins have tablets and King-Earl has been expecting one for him and another for his sister.

According him during a visit to his Aunty in Uyo:

Aunty Hope:   Earl, so you are going back to Lagos?
King-Earl:      Yes, Lagos where our Tablet is! Mine is going to be Navy Blue and Imani’s own will be Navy Pink. (all these responses whilsts reclining on her chair with his legs up and head down)

Another day…

King-Earl:     Daddy…
King:               Yes dude
King-Earl:      I’m giving you one week to buy our Tablets.

After a few days, which wasn’t up to one week yet.

King-Earl:      I’m giving you till tomorrow to take us back to Lagos where our Tablet is and buy it.

*As we speak, the Tablet matter has died down (at least for now). I guess something else has distracted him.

•••

Last night, we shared a bottle of wine between the four of us and King-Earl insisted that his be put in an empty Pepsi bottle. After which he moved close to Imani and did ‘cheers’. We all did it and gave toast. Shortly after that, King-Earl said “I wish my wine turned in Pepsi.”

I told him to pour his Wine into my wine glass and it will become Pepsi. Imani cautioned him against it, while the King laughed at my wayo. King-Earl moved calmly to me, stood by my side and said “I don’t want to break mummy’s heart. I’m only meant to fix it!”

That ended the wine-into-Pepsi saga.

*Wayo means Trickery

©2016. Frances Kelvin Otung. All rights reserved.

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Freedom Friday – Growing up with King Earl & others

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What are you afraid of letting someone see? Your humanness? For all you know, that’s what makes you more attractive or appealing to the significant other.

This is a call or call it ‘DARE’ to step out of your comfort zone, make the move to be friendly and maintain the friendship and that’s the first step towards a 1,000 miles which many people dread. Though, the first step, first smile, and even first hello might meet with a stony gaze flung in your direction, overtime when friendship is established, it will add a boost to your ego and raise your boldness bar – although initially, it never feels that way if truth be told. However, remind yourself that people who tend to snub others are trying to hide a part of themselves and their defence mechanism is to snub or shun anyone who attempts to break the barriers they have set round themselves as protection (from who knows what), probably a pain from betrayal which they have refused to let go, or a ‘fear’ about something they heard, which hasn’t happened yet, might never happen or to burst your bubble – will happen, but will make them stronger and more mature.

As we deal with relationships on all fronts like I earlier stated, we will also enjoy the world that has been built by a King in his own rights, and guided by his rules. Dear Reader, if you will not pay ‘obeisance’ to him, don’t bother reading on as he commands authority in the sweetest (and sometimes, most ‘annoying’) of ways.

Welcome to my world of Living and Growing up with King Earl. “Who is King Earl?” you would ask. He is 3 going on 4 years with a strong sense of who he is and what he wants, with analogous maturity of a 30 year old, a really handsome young man with lots of spunk! People wonder why I talk so much about King Earl. Is he an only child? No! The first? No, to that too! He is one individual that’s got a word for every season and always at the right time. Sometimes it comes off as being rude, but the young man is just being himself, an assertive, innocuous child that has been given the rhyming rights to free speech – one would think the world just discovered the new “Martin Luther King” in ‘an EARL’ this time (lol)! From fighting for his sister’s right, to defending me against his Dad or defending his Dad from me, he is everyone’s VOLTRON and Superhero. With King Earl, you cannot (I repeat CANNOT…in caps this time) have the last words.

Enjoy an episode by my dearest King Earl!
Dad: Earl! Earl!! Earl!!!
KE: “Why are you screaming Earl! Earl!!” (Still drawing his horses and dragons on a sheet of paper, with slight irritation on his face) “Is my name EARL?” he says to a bewildered father. “My name is King Earl!” he retorts with pride.
Interpretation: So Dad, either you get the name right and get my attention or suffer my silence :). Perchance you meet him, don’t forget to add ‘King’ to the Earl.
I am surrounded by two Kings. If you call Earl ‘King’ alone, he won’t answer you either as he needs to confirm which of the Kings you are referring to. He might be the younger, but authority is something he understands very well. And that he will not share!

Being open has afforded me the opportunity to speak into people’s lives and re-order their thought process positively. I feel (actually know), that there is a positive and negative way to look at anything. I try (remember I’m human too) to view most things positively so many times, it is a struggle but when I succeed, oh boy, it’s such a joy!

It’s Freedom Friday and what do you have to share? Whilst thinking about it, here’s Seasoned Sistah 2’s journey last week.

© 2015. Frances Kelvin Otung. All rights reserved

Freedom Friday – Speech Games with K.E

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King Earl:  Are you a girl?
Imani: (wondering where this is line of questioning is headed) Yes
King Earl:   Am I a boy?
Imani:         Yes
King Earl:   No I’m not a boy, I’m a son!
Imani:         Okay, you are a son.
King Earl:   No! I’m not a son, I’m a Moon
Imani: (Looking at him incredulously)  But you can’t be a Moon, nah.
King Earl:   I don’t want to be a Son again, I’m a Moon.

King Earl:  Mum, (quite innocently) I want to play your Candy Crush.
Me:           This one is difficult, you have to play with strategy
King Earl:  Okay, I will play with ‘stratedy’
Me:            It’s pronounced STRATEGY. Do you know what strategy is?
King Earl:   Yes (still focused and playing his game).
Me:            What does it mean?
King Earl:   So that we will not have any injury.

There it is!

A 3-year old giving me first hand definition of STRATEGY. Yes, he called it ‘Stratedy’, you know how King Earl can be with his pronunciations, he will simply refuse to call it any other way till he’s ready to do that. But his definition is so on point.

Strategy is “the science or art of combining and employing the means of war in planning and directing large military movements and operations.” Another meaning is “a plan, method, or series of manoeuvres or stratagems for obtaining a specific goal or result:” So when my son says “So that we will not have any injury”, he is correct – whether you agree or not. Not strategizing is bound to get you in the path of ‘casualty’ and though he has not been taught that yet in school, he just coined up his own meaning from whatever he figured mum was trying to say.

This and more are one of the many reasons I talk and listen to children – they say it the way it is! It is left for you to figure it out and understand. It is my day of Liberty and this is my prerogative. I’m still strategizing on how to go past that level of Candy Crush (when I have the time). So what’s your winning ‘STRATEDY’ for today?

© 2015. Frances Kelvin Otung. All rights reserved.

Tell Me What You Think of Me

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Tell Me What You Think of Me

Tell Me What You Think of Me

I’m not sure how it started but I think King and King Earl had a Father and Son session and King told him how he thought the world of him. The session usually goes like this:

Earl: Tell me what you think of me?

King: You’re smart, intelligent, brilliant, and handsome and you are the King!

At this point Earl replies too, “I think you’re smart, intelligent, and brilliant and you are the King!”

When he is telling Imani what he thinks of her, he goes: “I think you’re smart, intelligent, brilliant, and beautiful and you are the Princess. I am the King, Daddy is the King and Mummy is the Queen but you are the Princess.”

One day, his father reeled out all the lines and intentionally didn’t add the last one. Earl waited. King delayed and then we heard him say with urgency and a rebuking look “and I’m the King!”
LOL.

Tell Me What You Think of Me – 2

My sister in-law Esther called some time ago, and requested to talk with Earl. Grudgingly he came to the phone and after the initial response to her “how are you?” he goes, “Tell me what you think of me”. Not knowing the standard response, Esther goes, “you are cute, intelligent, and handsome” and she ends there. For Earl she had left out the most important one, unable to hide his displeasure, he adds with pride “and I’m the King!”

I took the phone from him and tried explaining to Esther the correct sequence, and we laughed over it. So she decided to ask him what he thought of her, and this was Earl’s response: “I’m not thinking of you, I’m thinking of Horses and Dragons.”

Phew! End of call.

© 2015. Frances Kelvin Otung. All rights reserved

Earl – Defender of Imani

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Earl – Defender of Imani

Back home and really tired from the day’s work. I ate a bit of jollof rice and decided to share the calories with my cousin. I noticed Imani’s eyes follow the plate but chose to ignore her. Esther (my cousin) asked her if she was interested and she replied in the affirmative. I sat back and watched them and the TV at the same time. They were circled round the rectangular centre table, Earl was drawing on one end, while Esther and Imani ate on the opposite side.

Imani: Aunty Esther, why are you eating the fish?

Esther: Is it yours? (munching away)

Imani: (protesting) But I want also! (looking upset and helpless at the same time). 😦

I pretended not to notice the altercation and continued with my movie. While the ‘fight’ lasted, Earl (apparently tired of hearing Imani whine helplessly) dropped his pencil, reached out to the plate, took out the remaining fish, “Imani, here you go” and shoved it into Imani’s mouth. Picked up his pencil and continued drawing as if nothing happened.

And yes, he got the needed silence to focus on his drawing, after we finished laughing.

© 2015. Imanikingblog. All rights reserved

Freedom Friday on a Saturday

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Hey Dream Reader and the many Readers I have in reality,

I’ve been away from FREEDOM FRIDAY…not because I don’t have what to be Free about but my Fridays have become so busy and …no more excuse. I have missed you too. I heard this conversation yesterday on my way home and I decided to share it here. Pity it will have a lot of Pidgin English inside but you should be able to decode them. LOL

I closed rather late yesterday as has been the case lately (trying to finish up on some important work) and as I grabbed a seat on the bus, the following conversation ensued. By the way, this is one of the many reasons, I miss my bus rides when the car is available – so enjoy it with me today. Who knows when next I’ll have another experience?

“Conductor, give me my change!”

“I no get change yet.”

“But I will drop at Agungi,” she protested

“The first person to drop, is the first person I will give change.” He answers with finality

“No mind am, he doesn’t want to give you change, he has plenty N50s in his hand,” a fellow passenger joined in the discussion.

“What is your business in this matter? You NONONTITY!” the conductor reels out and the other passengers join the discussion laughing and telling him the proper pronunciation. “It’s NONENTITY o!”

“Don’t mind him, I don’t want to say anything to him, he is a miscreant. I don’t want to abuse him.”

“What abuse can you give me more than that, can you talk to your senior like that?” the conductor queried, “You are a NONONTITY!”

“This is one of the reasons I love Lagos, it is the City of Excellent Madness.” another passenger interjects.

“I love Lagos but TRAFFIC has made me to dislike this place. I went to Ebonyi the other day and would have remained there, but I didn’t have anything good doing,” another replies.

“For your information,” the conductor goes back to the pending matter “I paid for that English.”

At this point, one of the passengers that had been silent all along except for laughing in-between turned and looked at him and said “Who collect the money from your hand?” and that brought another bout of laughter.

Well, I was laughing all along and taking note in my head what each was saying and I picked up a strong whiff of alcohol and its source was none other than the Conductor! I pray he doesn’t fall off the bus before they get to their destination.

© 2014. imanikingblog. All rights reserved

The Beautiful Ones Are Born

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An unnamed beauty

An unnamed beauty

As he sat with Earl aged 3, my hubby flipped through his phone checking out peoples’ updates. He came across this beautiful picture above and flipped on. Earl flipped it back to the pix and the following conversation took place.

Earl: Daddy, can I hug her?

Daddy (takes the phone close to Earl’s heart and says): Booom

Earl (with exasperation): But I can’t hug her through the phone! Bring her out.

King watched with shock at his reasoning and before he could say anything, Earl continues.

Earl: Daddy, can I marry her?

Daddy (LOL): What do you know about marriage?

Earl replies with conviction, “She’s so beautiful” and repeats again “She’s so beautiful”.

Next day, King is on his way to pick my mum from the airport and informs Earl. And Earl asks him if he would bring the dark girl home with him.

So here’s my take on the matter, I have decided to put up her picture and request that the parents of the above unnamed beauty kindly contact me as a matter of urgency, as the person who had this picture as her DP doesn’t even know her! If you were me, what would you do, if your 3 year old asked you for permission to marry a fine girl?