Tag Archives: Making a Difference

#WQWWC – Change

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Can you believe it?! This week’s topic is a phenomenon that reigned (in words) in Nigeria some months back. Why did I use the word ‘reigned’, you see in Nigeria when something is in focus or en vogue for a while, we call it ‘REIGNING’. https://silverthreading.com/2016/05/11/writers-quote-wednesday-writing-challenge-change/

The new dispensation or crop of leaders came in with their Mantra tagged ‘Change’. Has much changed in Nigeria? Yes o! Positively? Depends on who is looking. The person selling the Change story would say YES things have changed and improved. For the sakes of fairness, I will only address what concerns me.

For the past week or more we have been in darkness and PMS (Gasoline) has been up and up and down and upper, sometimes none at all. Do we still get to buy? Eventually, at a cost to your pocket, body, car etc.

  • For the Pocket, the guy by the roadside sells his black market at a ridiculously high rate, we don’t patronise him or her, but people do and they are situated right beside the fuelling station. I hear from the attendants “we don’t sell to anyone with Jerrycans, bring your generators” and by the next day, “we don’t sell to generators too!” So we are wondering, how we will have power in the house when we can’t get fuel for the generator or get power from Power Holding Company of Nigeria?
  • For the Body, you will suffer bodily wise with dragging on the queuing line with agberos (touts) manning the gates, men of the force and other car-users looking to get the product too!
  • For the Car, whilst you are trying to push your car that has no fuel into the station, another car smoothly turns in front of you.

Now, it is Tomatoes whose price has skyrocketted and no end in sight to its increase. The sad part is when you complain, the mallam, tells you ‘nah Change’. I thought Change was meant to be positive or at least yield positive results. In a way, it has made many of us return to other recipes we abandoned and local food.

Whilst there’s so much to complain about the current system, I have decided to work on some changes personally. Watch what I say (as always) because words are seeds and I’m expecting a harvest. Come up with new and creative ideas and strategies to change situations around me. Be the Change I want to see in my home, to my King, colleagues, family and Lagos road-users…for this set of peeps, you need special GRACE, I tell you. But it will work together for good!

Picture Sources: http://quotesgram.com/it-starts-with-you-quotes/

http://ryan30rapadas.blogspot.com.ng/2014/03/i-m-t-h-e-key-to-change-when-we-are-no.html

https://www.pinterest.com/

Writers Quote Wednesday Writing Challenge

©2016. Frances Kelvin Otung. All rights reserved

 

 

 

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WHAT’S IN A FIGHT?

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I have read severally about the topic ‘What’s in a name?’ So today for a change, I decided to find out what is really in a fight.
i-m-mad-at-you-but-i-still-love-youWell, I love fights…is something wrong with me, NOPE! Am I troublesome…? (Thinking, I’ll let my crew answer that and that’s if you have their phone numbers or email addresses then you can ask them. Till then you have to stick with me and believe what I say. winking at the autonomy I hold). Well, I can say I’m mischievous in a sweet way and that’s if you get to understand me. If not, we will constantly be fighting…trying to take territories that aren’t even ours! Vanity, says the Philosopher.

Why do I love ‘fights’? Am I not violent? NOPE! I love a good argument that you can clearly lay out and get the other person to understand you. It doesn’t mean they will accept your reasoning, but at least you have made the point clear and communication flow better. A good fight (not according to Apostle Paul this time) is one that results in good fruits (find the list below and by the way you can add yours) and that what I’m all about today. I always quote to my crew, “I don’t do battles without spoils.” ‘Spoils’ here doesn’t mean I conquered, but that we overcame that hurdle and are the better for it and are a lot better where we are now than where we first began.

The King and I know how to do the good fight and permit me to say, it’s brought us far and made us better. One thing we tell ourselves during it is that “we are not opponents but team members.” And what do team members do, they strive to achieve a common goal. So in these kinds of fight, there are no spoils (the kind you are expecting), but spoils called PEACE to gain and HOT LOVE to enjoy!

A fight tells me the following:
1. We still have unresolved issues in the case of understanding tones, non-verbal communication etc.
2. We care about each other (in a crazy way)
3. It’s time to take a decision
4. Communication lines are going to be unclogged and improved. There will be talking and listening.
5. New commitments will be made
6. Someone just made a decision not to be silent anymore and keep taking it in
7. Self-realisation – that there more to me than who I am.
8. The carpet is bulging from too many things being swept under it and not out into the bin where it belongs!
9. We have given up on each other and can’t take “it” anymore? What if it means good bye?
10. My view point may not be the best, even if it’s often difficult to admit that.

picture109Benefits of a good fight:
• A good fight makes you go outside your borders (in understanding that the last time I did this, it didn’t end well, so let me try the new improved method of reaching out to this person).
• It makes you understand the significant other a lot better. For heaven’s sakes, even twins are not alike to the last dot as we erroneously believe talk less of someone you got into a relationship with or got married to. They come from a different ‘planet’, have differing fields of experiences. We try to merge the two and as with all mergers, there will be areas of conflict that need addressing and polishing to smoothen out rough edges.
• A good fight spices up things and the makeup session is something else! Especially for the married ones. Smiling mischievously…again!
• It exposes strengths and weaknesses. We need to be open to our weaknesses and see how they are complemented by the other’s strengths. This produces a great team; a focused team!

Let’s hear your take on this matter. How do you handle fights, what are the benefits you have seen so far? Eagerly waiting to hear. Inbetween: I didn’t have a fight, just wanted to talk about it and hear differently. ❤ 🙂

Picture credits:
http://imgarcade.com/1/im-angry-but-i-still-love-you/
http://imgarcade.com/1/im-angry-but-i-still-love-you/

© 2015. Frances Kelvin Otung. All rights reserved

#Writer’sQuoteWednesday on a Thursday

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Its WQW on a Thursday (as usual for me 🙂 ) I chose this quote for one reason viewed in many parts.

Thankful Thursday_190815For one, it tells you that what really matters in the end is the LIFE in your years and it hit me that the years spent on this side of eternity is made up of several lives per person …. And what do I mean by that. Take me for instance, I have a life as a mother, a daughter, a sister, a girlfriend, a writer, a believer etc. Have I truly lived these several aspects of my life or I just got tired of one and let it become obsolete.

Today, I will encourage you to live each life to the brim, you hear me, to the brim. So that when your years are complete, you will have no regrets and neither will the people around you or the world at large, so creation can testify that Frances made a mark! By the way, am still here and doing it…slowly maybe, but surely!

How about you?

Picture source: http://itsgr9.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Abraham-Lincoln-.jpg

©2015. Frances Kelvin Otung. All rights reserved

Thankful Thursday

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People come into your life for different reasons and for a season. Some stay till the end with you, others just have to move on to the next phase of their lives. But when God brings people your way, the onus is on you to tap into that wealth your friendship activates, partake of the union truthfully, bring YOU to the table, get better and also improve their lives; so when you are away from each other, they will always remember you with a smile 🙂 .

Like I always say, one of my sources of wealth is the relationships God has blessed me with. I’m celebrating another of such persons today. Join me and say thank you.

Thankful Thursday_140515

© 2015. Frances Kelvin Otung. All rights reserved

I don’t need to contest

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Does it bother me that election is around the corner…hmmm maybe.

Not because of the results, but what people would do to achieve these results and it gets me thinking, do we have to go that far to make a difference? We were told in the news to take 7th November off and go pick up our permanent voter card. I couldn’t be off work but those that were (like my King) went to the same venue we got the temporary card years back and didn’t meet anyone. He repeated that journey twice that day and same thing. Someone advised him to go to the APC office…now I’m not sure where that is. Well, the issue of non-availability of permanent voters’ card will be a matter for another day soon.

Right now, with everyone promising us Heaven on Earth and in the Deep Blue Sea and our hearts saying abi nah singing “It’s the same old song…” what do we do? If you were me (us) what would you do? We have to vote whether we like it or not, but the sad part will be when we have 12 bad eggs and have to choose one. What happened to the good eggs?

So this is my take, let’s break, throw, flush, and dispose all the bad eggs and leave the podium for good eggs to roll on. Nigeria, has gotten to the point that we are no longer fooled by empty promises…Not like we didn’t know the difference before o! But when faced with so many bad options, we chose the ‘lesser evil’. Whilst you are thinking about it, who will do this flushing?

I sit and watch the drama unfold, the different scene. As one airs the other’s dirty linen outside just to discredit him/her, but you are dealing with intellectuals here Mr. Politician. How do you want us to view you when you take over, as a vengeful person who can’t fight square? Stop showing us their backside that is bent, dance ya own dance and let us determine if you are fit for our stage. What is your antecedent? What did you do the last time we gave you that opportunity? Shouldn’t there be a retirement age for Politicians? Why won’t they let the young ones try out their wisdom at ruling and taking decisions ehen? Nso ke ado?! What is it? I’m exasperated to the point that I could easily write the rest in my native language.

‘Akwa Ibom ado ok’ (Akwa Ibom is okay) and if you don’t believe me, take a trip there. Like the Governor would say there is uncommon transformation.

I said that to say this, rather than spend millions to buy a form for the Presidential Elections, I’d rather use that money to transform this nation and there are so many projects begging to be handled. Posterity would thank me later and even if they didn’t, the satisfaction I’d get from seeing joy on peoples’ faces for lighting up their dark (literally) would be immense…the naysayers regardless.

Before you spend that money and lose the election because you can’t play dirty like them, use it and continue the good works or start one. A word is enough for the wise. I’m done!