Dear God

Dear God ❤️….
I may not often express what my heart feels towards You because I know You can read my unsaid. Yet, I realise that it floods my being with tenderness and deep love when I do. I get soaked into Your arms, love, and presence. I step into a time and space that I don’t want to leave anymore, and it leaves me wanting more and more of You; activating in me a hunger for You that is not easily assuaged.

Today, I’ve come to pour my love on You as it gushes from my core, my Lord, my Glory and Lifter of my head, my Lyrics and Song, my Lifeline, my Anchor, my Wonder. It is You who makes every day worth waking up to. You put rhythm into my unsteady steps and add the beats to it. You remind me of the times and seasons that only You could have made possible and yet still paint me a picture of more to be expressed.

How do I repay this Love that leaves me weak and unable to articulate the flow within me?
How do I get the world to feel like I do and more?
How do I get them to understand that Your expressions are beyond the things, the tangible, the seen to that which the mouth cannot utter?
How?!

It may take more than a lifetime, but as long as I draw breath,…
I will say “Thank You”,
I will carve the words, “I love You!”
I will declare that You alone art worthy to receive my praise.
I may not get the words right, but I’m glad that You understand the depth of my unsaid and know I mean it.

I stopped by to say You are good to me, and I love being Loved by You! ❤️ 😍

I Am IMAN – I Manifest Adonai’s Nature
#UnapologeticallyMe
#Iman
#imaniking
#imanwrites
#imaninspires

@imanikel 01032024 Frances Kelvin Otung (c)

Remembering Uncle Sam ❤️

“Remember” is not the word you use for someone unforgettable! You simply don’t go a day without reminiscing over something they did or said and even when you do, your life by default responds to what they would have said given the situation you find yourself.

Uncle Sam is present! He is not just present by being here through the legacy he built in lives and communities, for Kingdom and humanity, he is a PRESENT, a gift that we will always be thankful to God for.

When you passed on last year, I couldn’t bring myself to cry, I still haven’t. I went into shock because we had plans about uniting the family, rebuilding broken down altars and changing the few negative narratives around our families for good. Sometimes, when I think about our several conversations from my teenager years – how you encouraged me to speak up, how we would negotiate my ‘punishment’ because I dropped the ball concerning something you had said not to do…I smile. I’m always in your defence, telling all who cared to listen, that you are not a difficult person to live with as long as they obeyed your instructions. But they don’t believe me and truly never did stay long with you, but I did and our friendship (despite the age gap) grew till you passed on.

Being a voracious reader with no TV to watch back then (because you didn’t want one contaminating my values), I remember the look of disappointment on your face when you ‘caught’ me reading a James Hardley Chase! If anyone knows a “Chase” book, you would recall that the cover would definitely be that of a semi-clad woman. But like I told you in my defence, that it was a thriller and had no sexual thingy in it..and boy, I love thrillers! You still felt, the pictures were suggestive and would pollute the mind. You bi Deeperlife Pastor, what did I expect?! I particularly didn’t like the pictures either, but I needed to read the stories. So I resorted to taking off the back…or covering them with used calendar to avoid-stories-that-touch. I think eventually I stopped reading them whilst with you so I don’t feel guilty.

One of our favourite pastime were our conversations! You would ask me what I did during the day after school, write about my holiday when I returned from Port-Harcourt (it was in one of my “How I spent my holiday” that you learnt what I had been up to as I would give details) poor child, what did I know. I was just being myself, saying it the way it is. But these are the values I learnt from you, speaking the truth at all times and with boldness. Our conversations even after I had gotten married, was one that Oba couldn’t interrupt. LOL. He had his own special time with you.

I remember on one of your visits to see Daddy, you said to me, “you guys are still ‘disturbing’ popsie” and I responded, “you know your brother, he doesn’t know when to stop because as far as he is concerned, we will always be his children”. You continued that he still treats you guys as little brothers too even after marriage and children (and I wasn’t even married then) and we laughed conspiratorially because that’s Daddy for you.

Your commission to Ini and I to gather information and write about the family was never done. Will we do it? I don’t know, but one thing I do know is, I will keep sharing your values, the Word, listening to your VNs and reading the few chats I have left of you and remembering the Uncle who became a 2nd father to me.

Happy posthumous 70th birthday to you Uncle Sam, I miss you so much!

@imanikel 02032023 (c) Frances Kelvin Otung

I Manifest Adonai’s Nature
#UnapologeticallyMe

I’m In Love With A Cook!

You see, I usually don’t get hungry or eat before 11am and any day I do that, then something unusual had happened. I’ll leave the reasons for another day. Before, you begin your sermon on “breakfast is the most important meal of the day”, can I be excused briefly from this Master class? Thank you.

To make matters worse, I don’t love bread (just like my dad 😌) except it is toasted and has some messages inside that I have to decode, then you’ve got me! By the way, those ‘coded messages’ should not make my bread soggy or else, I won’t eat it.

Imagine my shock and much to my delight this morning when I asked Oba to help me with eggs and sausage and the helping took a while as I dressed up, only to see toasted bread in my food pack 😳. I lifted the bread to be sure the eggs were there…after all that’s the request.
Eggs? ✅
Sausage? ✅
And I dropped back the bread with a mild protest of “I may likely not eat this because it will get soggy!”
Oba responds, “It’s toasted bread, baby!”
I can see that, but it’s still hot and by the time I get to the office, it will be. I protested.

Fast forward to office scenario:
The bread started calling my name just before work began, I still had time on my hands, I simply ignored it. After all, I don’t get hungry before 11am. Next thing, I knew, I brought the pack out to keep it close so I can delve into it when it’s time but alas, the sounds grew stronger and stronger and with each cry to be redeemed, my defenses fell apart. I hate to admit.

I began thinking about giving you this gist with half a piece gone, but by the time I got to typing the title, the whole slice had disappeared.
Boy! That was delicious!
After adding some messages inside, he pan-toasted the bread. So I didn’t get a hard-crust toasted bread, but a succulent, soft and now decoded bread with my eggs and sausage till awaiting demolition at a later hour.

So you see why I’m in love with the cook, because he knew my button and he pressed it well, till I broke my own law!

It’s #ThankfulTuesday and I have someone to thank God for and he is all mine!

PS: When I told Oba “I’m in love with a cook”, he asked me which one? And I asked him how many he knew. He listed Udy of @foodtopiaud and Idong of @idy_lacremecakes, but left himself out.
This is just you babes! And it’s a double!

#UnapologeticallyMe

@imanikel 051021 (c) Frances Kelvin Otung

When Lovers Fight… 😟😉😳🏃‍♀️

Dear Heart,

I have a question for you.

*“Go ahead, I’m listening”

Why do you hurt so much when I’m offended and upset at him? (Let me add a second)
Why does he go about smiling and grinning as if what happened didn’t do a number on him or pluck a nerve in him!
Is it that I never meant anything to him? 😟😳
If you feel sad in me about what has happened and want to reconcile, how come your twin in him, is cocky and won’t bow to please you and make me feel better?

“Iman?”

Yes, Heart? 😔 and don’t give me the he’s-a-man card, you’ve played that card for too long!

“Yes, he has a heart like you have me, but he is wired differently. By this I mean, some of them don’t wear their hearts on their sleeves like you do! And just so you know, when you are hurt, he hurts too, because you are connected by love (Soulmates), woven in emotions, bonded in spirit. He may not show it, he may even call your bluff, but trust me on this, the pain is real for him as well. When you ‘fight’, he acts out in different ways that says, I-don’t-care-you-didn’t-affect-me-that-much.”

“Let me ask you Iman, would you rather do battle or do love?!”

But you know I love Love and there’s no beating about the bush on that. So does that give him the right to hurt me by acting tough rather than say sorry?, not like the sorry would really matter, but I’m a babe and the sorry would mean, “I acknowledge I was wrong here and I miss our companionship”, I miss our time together, let’s make up, my world has been not-it without you and so much more, if you get what I mean.

“O yeah sure I get your point… but let’s try something out. Since you know you love Love, why not talk about what he did that you don’t like in a loving and friendly manner and see if he will come to you. If that doesn’t work….”

I give him the silent treatment, right?! 💃

” 😂😂😂😂😂 Iman???
Why do you love pulling the silent treatment card always? But you claim to love love; love keeps no records of wrongs, but seeks to breed peace at all times”

“If you search within you, you will realise you know how to reach him more smoothly… like you say in Nigeria, you hold his **mumu-button, simply activate it with a smile,…trust me he will come panting after you.”

Go no further, Heart. You’ve just hit the nail on the head. But please have a word with your twin in him and tell him to soften up his master, we can’t keep activating the mumu-button over ‘fights’, it’s for special times, if you get what I mean.

“But Iman, you know you don’t have to be religious with your “Special Moments”, besides you need that button the most in times of conflicts. You know Iman, it’s wearisome trying to reach the one you love when both of you are being driven apart by your ego.”

Hello Heart, For the life of me, I’m wondering, when did we join the opponent’s team, we ought to be on the same team for Christ’s sake. I am not the enemy! and there’s no trophy to win in fighting each other, can’t you see!?

“I understand you clearly Iman, but you see, when we talk about loving and giving, respect is also a gift as compassion is a gift. “A gentle answer turns away wrath” as the Bible says.”

…but some people have interpreted it to mean a gentle answer by a woman, turns away the wrath of a man… isn’t it?

“It is both ways o! So let’s be intentional in loving, You and I, together we can do better. Let’s be mindful of our lines and ways of communication when we are angry with him, because there are some words you’d say in that moment of rage that when the battle is over and we feel right about pushing the mumu-button, we may push for so long and run the battery out, because of hanging memories of the things said in anger.”

“Wash your mouth…oops, I meant to say WATCH your mouth. You don’t want to live your life in regrets because you wouldn’t let go of your title on the EGO belt.”

Hmmmmmm Heart?? 🙈🙈🙈 you are so right you know?

“O sure Iman, that is why I am your partner in this love relationship. You know you can’t always rely on your head, but on me; I help you make the best decisions girl”

Thanks Heart. I truly appreciate your honesty with me, I’ll keep these words really close to you, and follow through on them. Once again, thank you for being a sweetheart for real.

Heart??

“Yes Iman?”

You know? He actually said sorry, and that he wasn’t okay when I wasn’t; and I’m glad it’s all sorted now. But don’t forget to talk to his heart too ok?

One more thing Heart, “I don’t know his mumu-button, because I am his mumu-button!💃😘😘😘

Yours in love,
#UnapologeticallyMe

@imanikel 060821 (c) Frances Kelvin Otung

*Words in bold and italics are my heart’s responses

**mumu-button simply means the different methods you can easily reach a loved one and get them to ease up or succumb to you.

Meditation helps

Oba is away for a while to address work and settle family matters. This means we get to relate mostly via phone. The question begs, when someone you relate with everyday, like almost every other hour is not in proximity with and to you, how do you keep the fire burning, their touch close or their voices within ear shot?

You think about them!
Yes, have your mind full of their thoughts, voices and everything that reminds you of them. To the point that, if you had a question you would have asked them for their opinions, you can easily tell what their responses would be because you have your mind full of them. Therefore, you will hear a voice say “this is the way, walk in it!”

Little wonder, the Bible enjoins us “to mediate on it day and night and observe to do according to all that is written”, to “think on these things”, and to be “as the man thinks in his heart”

The word meditation comes from the Latin word meditārī, which has a range of meanings including to reflect on, to study, and to practice. It is the act of remaining in a silent and calm state for a period of time, as part of a religious training, or so that you are more able to deal with the problems of everyday life. It is also the act of thinking about something very carefully and deeply for a long time.

I’m not dealing with the yoga-kind of meditation here, just a simple clearing or better put decluttering your mind of unnecessary thoughts that are not progressive to your health, well-being, relationships with their spouses or others, work, family, dreams/aspirations and focusing on those thoughts that are!

The fact that people most and generally do not give time to “thinking” (meditating) on each aspect of their lives as they ought to. Thinking on (investing thoughts) these parts of our lives actually means fuelling life into them, and breathing on them to live.

If we can commit to thinking deeply (meditate), on everything we hope to see life happen on another level just as we want it to, I’m sure they will come alive just the way we see them in the place of meditation.

Meditation implies investing thoughts, it is a SEED planted, you can plant, then nurture daily by thinking a step deeper and deeper, until the desired end is achieved.

I love this aspect, it does not have to happen immediately, but being consistent in adding a thought on the positives side, and deepening every passing day, births the positive giant we wish to see

Let’s do right by peace, joy and love today, create that atmosphere around you, carry it wherever you are! Let your meditation be on that which is lovely, true, honest, has virtue and is of a good report. Who agrees to this mind change? Let’s see it in your action!😘

@imanikel 27102020 Frances Kelvin Otung

My Melting Point

You melt the coldest of heart with your love
with the ease of one that comes from above.
By deeds so little, yet mean so much to me
you leave me in awe of how sweet life can be!
Hmmm, they say, “there she goes again,
strutting her stuff without bargain!”
But how do I state or explain
the little things you do, though plain
How do I capture in clear terms
that you are soft, yet very firm.
By your touch my defenses fall
and in silence, I hear you call.
Far or near, your words are so dear
their meanings, I hold with much care.

Today, I remember my days
when thoughts of you came out to play
I just said to stop by and say…
“You are my ‘go-to’ any day!”

@imanikel 18092020 Frances Kelvin Otung

#FreedomFriday – Watching Weight

I’m intentional about my topic, I could easily have labelled it as “weight watching”, but that’s exactly what Oba called it. You see, he called me the other day, just after my early morning exercise. Funny, I thought ‘exercise’ but my fingers were typing “sacrifice” and it hit me, truly, it is a sacrifice because some mornings I’m sooooooo tired and I want to just crawl back into bed after devotion to catch a bit of nap after a night of watching Netflix or better put, being watched by movies on Netflix. (Hmmm. Please do not laugh and if you do, make sure I’m not listening), but I drag myself out of my nightie into my exercise gear, grumbling seriously in my heart, but bent on doing the 30 mins – 1 hour of walking, jumping etc that I do.

As I was saying, Oba called and after I told him what I had accomplished that morning, he yawned repeatedly and this isn’t the “I’m-tired-kinda-yawn” but the “Boy-I’m-very-hungry-type!” So, the big question I asked was,

Have you eaten?
I’m watching my weight
Indeed, my love, that’s what you are doing, “watching the weight” (I burst out laughing), please can you add some exercise to it. It’s not a movie.
I lift weights, he protested.
I know, you carry them to the Lord in prayer. I continued to yab him.

He is not the only one who keeps watching his weight and expecting something to happen, he actually does his exercises, but I just felt like being on his matter that morning, *tongue out*. Some, have heard it repeatedly that “as a man thinks in his heart, so is he!” So, they assume that as they think it, they become it.

Some things, are like faith, they require believe and action. You don’t have to do much, just be determined that you have dwelt in this mount too long and its time to turn. I don’t have any problem with your body size as long as you are comfortable with it, I’m just sharing a personal moment my hubby and I had.

By the way, I’m beautifully and wonderfully made, but I’m intentional about climbing the steps to my office and not breathing too hard to get to the top. I enjoy the boost I get when I’m done with the early morning exercise and truth be told, I’m feeling a bit lighter, which I like. It is a personal choice and whatever you choose to do this Friday is up to you! I salute your choice as long as it doesn’t hurt the next person. I’m off to get ready for being watched by Netflix later at night…don’t tell anyone.

I Am IMAN – I Manifest Adonai’s Nature #UnapologeticallyMe

@imanikel 24072020 Frances Kelvin Otung

A Different Kind of Kind

Ronovan Writes Décima Poetry Challenge Prompt No. 15 (KIND) This week, it’s the B rhyme line.

A world devoid of stuff that's good
Presents a different "be kind"
This thought came to harass my mind. 
In a world of eroding good 
How does one survive the hood?
From the love shown by another
Moving through cracks across borders...
Touching lives in simple sweet ways
We remind them of good old days...
And rise above selfish orders!

@imanikel 23072020 Frances Kelvin Otung

Change of mind

Haiku #110 Change & Mind looks yummy!

 

No Turning Back

‘I do’ are two words

To one soul to keep two whole

No mind Change, tis you!

Creativity

Advanced perception

Shapes taking new forms – beauty

Evident to all!

©2016. Frances Kelvin Otung. All rights reserved

Picture Sources: http://www.iwallhd.com/wallpaper/1356×1356/manipulation-technique-tablet.html

Intimate Wedding in the Middle of the Ocean: Thomas & Kimberly

Help!!! I’ve been pulled back

I just have to keep going, keep pressing on against the wind, against the sand in my face, through these sea of bodies. It’s a fight for survival. Everyone is doing it, so I might just get to the end of the race regardless of how my bones ache and my body is begging for respite.

Looking back, I’ve made quite some progress, nothing much to write home about, but at least I’ve left the start line and I’m in motion. That’s what it is, right? Everyone is in motion, therefore, I must count in that number. It doesn’t feel like much. As a matter of fact, I feel alone and left to struggle this out on my own.

Thought You said “You loved me?!”
“I’ll never leave you nor forsake you”
Where are You in all this?
“I am with you till the end of the age.”
Then why do I feel so alone?
“You are not alone, child, before you were born I knew you.”
‘Knowing’ shows intimacy, is this how You treat people You love? I heard that “Love gives!”
“I gave you Jesus!”
And where is He right now that I need answers?

I question the Answer as I run on, shooting down every response He gives to me. How can He be unmoved by all I’m going through?

G flies past me, no worries, I’ll catch up with you soon. O waves as he glides away, my heart sinks. Watching Z breeze easily away, was the last straw and then He stops me.

HELP!!!

Somebody help me! I’ve been stopped in the middle of my race.
Help! I’ve been pulled back by One who said He loves me. Don’t be callous, don’t race on as if you can’t see my situation. Does it not look awkward to you as I stand still, while others fly past? Can’t you tell something is wrong? Help! I’ve been pulled back by the Hand that was meant to assist me.

How sad 😦

• To fire a gun, the trigger is taken back.
• A bowstring is pulled back and the aim (target) in focus before the archer releases the arrow, so it goes further.

©2016. Frances Kelvin Otung. All rights reserved